The Chilton Song Lyrics - Panhandlers


It's been a long day, since I woke up
Spilled the Allsups coffee in my pickup truck
Was headed to work, when on my drive
I got a ticket going 60 in a 55
Clocked in for a job, that I can't stand
I'm on the verge of quitting or getting canned
I'll be so damn glad when this day is through
When I get home I know just what I'll do

Go grab a cup
Rim it with salt
Pull down the vodka
And pour in a shot
Pop a top of Topo Chico
Only one thing left to put in
Yeah, when life gives you lemons
Make you a Chilton

All of your worry and all of your trouble
Will be gone after one, so just make it double
That's when it hit will ya, this revelation
This drink might be man's finest creation
When your heart is aching
Or the sun is baking
Or the tax man comes once more for the taking...

When it's quitting time
You're feeling thirsty
It's 5 o'clock somewhere or maybe 10:30

Go grab a cup
Rim it with salt
Pull down the vodka
Pour in a shot (or two, or three)
Pop a top of Topo Chico
Only one thing left to put in
Yeah, when life gives you lemons
Make you a Chilton

Now here's what you do
You keep it simple, stupid
You just follow the instructions
Get a cup or a glass and some ice cubes
Pour in a little Topo Chico, add salt
And 3 fingers of vodka
Texan, Russian, well maybe not Russian
But you get the point

Now most importantly grab some lemons
Squeeze half a lemon, squeeze a whole lemon
Hell go crazy squeeze two whole lemons
Mix it all up and enjoy

So when you're burned out on beer
The whiskey ain't working
The wine is fine
But it just leaves you hurting
When you're tired of tequila
All out of rum
I'll tell u what we do where I come from

Grab you a cup
Rim it with salt
Pull down the vodka
Pour in a shot (or two, or three, or four)
Pop a top of Topo Chico
Only one thing left to put in
When life gives you lemons
Make you a Chilton

Yeah when life gives you lemons
Make you a Chilton