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Sixteen Little Red Noses lyrics - Jim Stafford

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I said yeah yeah
No no no no no no

Now listen to me
My wife ran off with the garbage man
My wife ran off with the garbage man
Now I don't miss that woman
But somebody gotta empty my can

Now let me tell you what happened

I came home the other night
Caught the two of you alone
And you told me was a nudist
Who came in to use the phone

Well I come from Alabama baby
And I got this banjo on my knee
Now you know I love to pick the banjo
Why does the whole wide world gotta pick on me?

Listen to this honey

I'm gon' to take you over to my place
I'm gonna to stomp on your head
I'm gon' kill you so bad
You gonna wish you was dead

I'm gonna mess with you baby
Now let me tell you what I'm gonna do

I'm gonna take you to a secret place
Where I got a vat full of dippity doo
Sixteen little red noses and a horse that sweats
Gonna dip you in that dippity doo
Tie a rubber band around my fanny
And run around you screamin' like I'm an airplane
And make me take off

Cause I love you baby oh

Love you pretty Momma
Yeah I love yeah yeah yeah
No no no no no

[Thanks to Chris Watson for lyrics]

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